Hello again, fellow General Hospital viewers! We've just been through a pretty action-packed week with a bunch of (apparently) significant developments in front-burner stories. The show's at an interesting juncture right now, with the fi-core scripts running out and the "official" regime on its way back onscreen, so I suspect we're witnessing a flurry of table-setting before the changeover. Either way, if nothing else, it was hard to be bored with GH last week. Let's dig in.
A Vanna Divided We Cannot Stand
GH can get pretty coy with its follow-up after a big cliffhanger, but last week, the show grabbed its "Anna shot Charlotte" thread and held on tight — four out of five episodes devoted a significant amount of focus to this story, and they weren't just placeholder scenes either. Monday's episode dealt with the immediate aftermath of the shooting, with Dante on the scene to take Anna's statement after Charlotte was carted off to the hospital. As I've said repeatedly here, I'm not wild about the writers giving Anna yet another thing to be tortured with guilt over, but hoo boy did Finola Hughes knock her scenes out of the park. After rushing to action and enlisting a panicked Jake to keep Charlotte stable until the paramedics arrived, the reality of what she'd done set in, and by the time she was able to talk to Dante about what happened, Anna was a sobbing wreck.
Continuing the show's bewildering yet altogether welcome streak of not writing every PCPD cop as a bumbling dope, Dante was low-key suspicious of Charlotte pretty much right away — as evidenced by the look he and Sam gave each other when Danny mentioned Charlotte and tarot. Those suspicions only increased when he was handed the inventory list from Charlotte's backpack, which included Anna's house key as well as a can of spray paint matching the color that was used to write MURDERER on Anna's townhouse months ago. Also eyeing Charlotte with concern: Kevin, who responded to the news of the shooting by telling Laura "That child is broken."
I take none of this for granted, because on GH, you never know when the writers will decide to have their characters abandon reason in response to something like this. They could easily have gone the town pariah route with Anna after the shooting, which would have been ridiculous — and they made a feint in that direction when they had Valentin greet Anna with a pained expression and a whispered "Why, Anna? Why?"
Fortunately, not even Valentin blames Anna for what happened. Although it took him a bit to finally come clean with her and let her know Charlotte had targeted her months ago, he was quick to tell Nina that he (quite rightly) blames himself for the shooting. James Patrick Stuart has been given a tough row to hoe here, and I think he's doing a fine job of playing overwhelming concern for his child layered between thick slices of guilt, self-loathing, and absolute uncertainty as to how he's supposed to relate to the woman who shot his daughter. It all culminated in a Friday stairwell standoff that started with Anna telling Valentin that Forsythe is behind everything, including somehow getting to Charlotte and using her as his tool — and ended with her hauling off and slapping Valentin after he confessed that he covered for Charlotte after she vandalized her hotel suite and he suspects she may have burned down the townhouse too.
It's no fun watching a solid soap couple be torn asunder, but this is exactly the type of conflict that countless classic stories have used for fuel, and with these two pros taking the lead, we're in good hands. Actually, strike that — we also have Genie Francis in the mix, so there's a whole cornucopia of generational acting talent being brought to bear.
It was Laura who held down half of arguably the most important scenes this story gave us last week — while Valentin was busy coming clean with Anna, Laura was at Charlotte's bedside, listening to her granddaughter twist the events leading up to the shooting. Having already lied to Valentin by telling him she was only in Anna's apartment so she could return the keys Anna "dropped," Charlotte insisted to Laura that Anna shot her on purpose — and as proof of Anna's allegedly nefarious intent, she opened up about Victor's role in all this, including his prediction that Anna intends to put Valentin on the hook for her alleged crimes.
Understandably desperate to talk to Charlotte after hearing Valentin's confession, Anna rushed to her hospital room, only to be barred from entering by Liz and Laura — the latter of whom ended Friday's episode by point blank saying, "She's terrified of you. She thinks you shot her on purpose."
As always, there are things we could quibble with here. I was at least mildly offended that neither Anna nor Robert were concerned about Anna's missing keys in the first place, and that it took both of them forever to make the fairly obvious connection to Charlotte. I also don't have a ton of patience for the "Forsythe" angle here — the writers have either been leaning way too hard on a red herring or we're about to meet a person from Anna's past who's somehow never been mentioned in the nearly 40 years since the character debuted, and neither option is very appealing to me. These are minor issues, however; against all odds, what was once a frustratingly diffuse storyline has been refined into an Emmy reel machine. I'm here for it and I'm pretty sure you are too.
Siren Snog
While Finola Hughes and James Patrick Stuart were getting the good stuff last week, poor Wally Kurth and Lisa LoCicero were handed a shit sandwich — or at least the last few bites of one, anyway. I'm referring, of course, to the interminable and interminably dumb Return of Eddie Maine storyline, which staggered to its conclusion with all the care and conviction of a sleep fart.
Here's how it went down: Lois, tired of listening to Eddie struggle with his dumb song about the siren of the sea, crumpled up his lyrics, threw them in the fire, and told him that he needed to go to the water and take a leap of faith if he ever wanted to finish the thing. Eddie, forever dumb as a post, walked out to the Quartermaine dock, took off his jacket, and jumped in the lake. Moments later, Olivia found said jacket, realized Eddie must have gone for a brisk November swim, and plunged in after him.
Naturally, Eddie ended up getting caught in some netting and couldn't figure out how to get himself free. Naturally, Olivia showed up just in time and dragged his unconscious body to shore. The silver lining in all this is that Eddie woke up as Ned again, and Ned remembers everything, including how selflessly supportive she was during his Eddie interlude, and now we can start forgetting that all of this ever happened. I'll say this much: Even though I'm semi-convinced that the writers hate Lisa LoCicero more than anybody except maybe Sofia Mattsson, she's never anything less than fully committed, and she's often able to inject real emotion into scenes that have no right to it. Case in point: When Ned regained consciousness after Olivia gave him CPR and he dazedly said she saved him, she sobbed that she'd do anything for him, and against my better judgment, I was moved. That's Acting, folks. Someday I hope she gets a storyline worthy of her talent.
Spencer Loses His Damn Mind
If you've watched soaps for any length of time, you know this drill: When the writers know an actor's on their way out for whatever reason and the character will have to go into storage for a spell, one of the quickest ways to arrange an exit is to have them start doing stupid shit, no matter how far out of character or altogether inexplicable it might be. With Nicholas Alexander Chavez likely approaching what seems to be at least an extended hiatus from GH, it's apparently time for Spencer to go cuckoo over the thought of potentially losing 24-hour access to his baby brother.
Friends, I am telling you nothing you aren't already painfully well aware of when I say this storyline is utterly ungood. It has wasted a significant chunk of Chavez's inevitably dwindling time in Port Charles, it has thrown cold water on what was once the show's hottest young couple, it hinges on the nonsensical and downright dull post-amnesia version of Esme sticking around, and worst of all, it makes no goddamn sense whatsoever.
I will concede that the writers have done a decent job of detailing Spencer's need to keep Ace from feeling the same disappointment and betrayal that he felt courtesy of Nikolas, and of course it makes sense that he wouldn't be thrilled by the idea of Esme raising a tank of Sea-Monkeys, let alone his brother. That being said, she's his mother and he has no leg to stand on. He might be feckless and callow, but he isn't an idiot, and it's supremely irritating to keep watching him act like one.
Things took a hard turn deeper into Dummyville last week when Esme went to Laura and told her about her plans to move out of the apartment — news that Laura greeted in extremely Laura fashion, first by saying she hoped Esme hadn't been feeling crowded, and then by insisting that she and Kevin chip in with the rent wherever Esme ended up finding a place to live. Although she was taken by surprise and not in a hurry to see them go, Laura ultimately ended up telling Esme that she thought she was making the right decision.
Spencer not only disagreed, he flat out told Laura that she was wrong — grounds for a death by lightning strike in Port Charles — and things got even worse when he started whining about it to Trina, who straight up laughed in his face and said "finally" to the news of Esme and Ace's impending departure. The argument took place in front of Joss and Dex, and Dex was the only person in the room to show any understanding of Spencer's position, which should have been the only clue Spencer needed to know he was acting like an ass.
But no. Instead he doubled down, telling Trina, "Don't make me choose between you and Ace. You won't like the answer" — and Trina told him not to worry because she'd make the choice for him, and walked right out the door. Others have suggested that perhaps this is the prelude to Spencer doing something illegal — perhaps kidnapping Ace? — before pulling a Nikolas and disappearing for a while, and I can see that happening. The thought of Esme spending six months crying about her baby makes me want to scream, but I can see it happening. What I would love to see instead is an exit storyline that makes a single lick of sense once in a while. Surprise me, GH writers. Please.
That's the big stuff. Now on to our bullet points!
It looks like Drew sustained a lasting injury during his time in Pentonville, although he isn't telling anybody about it
Chase and Lois both suggested that Brook Lynn accept Tracy's gift of Deception, then turn around and give the company back to Lucy — a suggestion that Brook Lynn dismissed as being not devious enough to counter her granny
Curtis went to the gym
Tracy left to go back to Amsterdam, where she and Bobbie will settle Luke's estate
Sasha had a last-minute shoot with a hotshot photographer/racist caricature, where she was joined by Cody and a goddamn alpaca
Sonny told Ava that Austin has obviously been working for Cyrus
Chase questioned Austin, then Mason… and later saw Austin having a heated conversation with Mason
Stella told Felicia that the last time she was in London, she met and fell in love with a man named George, but turned down his marriage proposal because her heart is in Port Charles
Blaze met Alexis, who told Kristina "I think she likes likes you"
Comments
Post a Comment